


Drinks After Work, Anyone?

by RovingTiger



Category: Veep
Genre: Drunken Shenanigans, Gen, Season 1/2 I think, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-06-15
Updated: 2014-06-14
Packaged: 2018-02-04 16:57:42
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,029
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1786423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RovingTiger/pseuds/RovingTiger
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Snapshots/vignettes of Selina's team winding down (or trying to) after work. Inspired by the end of 3.05. Rated Mature for 'robust' language.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Drinks After Work, Anyone?

It had been a very long day. Selina's well intentioned attempt at creating a Truancy Taskforce was being stonewalled by a series of Senators who either didn't give a shit or had been persuaded by their pollsters that they didn't give a shit. Amy had got into a blazing argument with her counterpart at Education who was fed up with them stepping on their toes and risking fifty separate arguments with the states, something not helped by Dan arriving to help out and turning out to be the secretary's daughter's ex, an increasingly common problem Amy was finding. Meanwhile, Mike tweeted from the Veep's official account that the Truancy Taskforce was actually a Triangle Taskforce (he blamed autocorrect), span it as a cooperative triad of departments, and having convinced both Education and Justice to sign up, HUD, HHS and the Treasury decided they wanted in if the others were. They managed a fudge, but only after a humiliating dash between departments and a vice-presidential dressing down about the necessity of not making policy through twitter fuckups. Amy, Dan, Sue, Gary and Mike sloped off from the office to the nearest bar at 10:30.

Two rounds later, they'd managed to move past shop talk. Or at least further away than they usually managed.

"Dan?" asked Amy, chewing on the olive that came with her Bloody Mary. "Can I ask you a serious question?"

"So the others haven't been?"

Amy ignored him. "How many cocks have you sucked?"

Dan spluttered on his drink. "Excuse me?"

Amy laughed cruelly. "You heard the question. You don't seem to have a moral limit most of the time, and cut swathes through the half the bitchy witches that populate DC, and don't even say it," as Dan's left eyebrow shot up and his familiar shit-eating sneer began to form," so I'm assuming you must have given some guy the same treatment for a job, or appointment or something. It's statistically likely, that's all I'm saying."

Dan looked genuinely thrown for about the third time she'd known him. Amy grinned as he paused, mouth forming an answer, noticing the others were now peering along the bar at Dan.

"I will accept handjobs too, if you're trying to work out if they count." Amy hurriedly mouthed a denial at Mike, who looked quite surprised without the benefit of context. 

Dan shook his head. "No, its not that. I wouldn't. I mean, I haven't. Nothing against gays, obviously, but I'm not that, and that would properly fuck my career up."

"People are much more accepting these days, Dan." Mike opined.

Dan turned. "Oh, so the cowardly lion's getting involved. People are accepting if you are gay, obviously. It's when you're not gay and do gay stuff, that's when you get into trouble."

Amy pressed on. "So never? Not even a quickie? You were a staffer on the Commerce Committee though, which was kinda notorious back in the day if I remember correctly, what with Senator Reybauld prowling around. He was worse than Reeves with the male staffers, apparently."

"No, he was before my time." Dan paused, and took another  slug of whiskey. "Fine, I may have played up to some guy at Interior once, because he had some good Fracking links, but nothing that couldn't be written off as gay bravado-ey, bantery bullshit. Everyone does it!" he protested as Amy started chuckling.

"I've never felt the need to pull out lesbian bravado to get by in DC, have you Sue?"

"Nope." Sue said, checking her cellphone.

"Despite your peachy little ass." Everyone turned to gape at Gary, whose grin froze. "You should have said. Sue. As a joke, I mean. Because of the lesb... It would have been... I need the bathroom."

Gary stumbled off his barstool hurriedly and slightly unsteadily,  as Sue sighed and returned to her cellphone.

Dan seized the opportunity to turn the conversation away from him. "Mike, what about you? Ever tickled moustaches for political advancement?"

Mike frowned. "Well, that's a horrible euphemism. Jonah would be proud. The eighties were a different time, anyway." There was a loaded silence for a second, when Mike started. "That wasn't me admitting to anything. It was just different. That's all I was saying." Another pause."I'll get some more drinks in."

Dan and Amy turned back to each other, trying not to snigger.

"So not even a bit of dry humping? Not even in that stupid frat you were in?"

Dan frowned. "I didn't tell you I was in a frat."

"It's really fucking obvious, Dan. Just, well. You were."

"No, nothing like that there. You've never gone gay for pay then?"

"I was headhunted by Selina straight out of college. So no need. I mean, I suppose I've sucked a lot of metaphorical dick and pussy, plenty just today, but that's DC. And metaphorical." She saw Dan's expression. "If you are about to insinuate what I think you're about to insinuate, I will see to it that you'll be Jonah's fucking gimp by the end of tomorrow."

"Well, my lips are sealed. And not by a zipper, or anything." Dan glanced to the empty barstool beside them. "Do you want to look in Leviathan? Sneak a peek?"

Amy shook her head. "We'll screw something up, Gary will notice tomorrow, and then Selina will notice. And anyway, it's probably dangerous, like putting your hand in a wizard's pocket or something."

"Or sleeve?"

Amy looked puzzled, then punched Dan in the arm. "I'm not talking to you, using that kind of, well, whatever the fuck  that was, this sober. Mike!"

Mike turned from Sue. "Hmm?"

"You said you were getting more drinks in?"

"I didn't mean it, did I? What, am I made of money?"

"Sue?"

"I'm done. And frankly, I think you two have had enough."

"What?" said Dan. "We've had two each. It's not exactly moonshine."

"Yeah, and you're way too affable. That was a friendly punch."

"So what? Let me be punched by my ex..."

"And boss. I'm his boss. I want to make that clear."

Dan sighed. ".. and boss in peace."

"Whatever floats your boat." murmured Mike.

"Fuck off. Hey, Richard? Two more?"

**Author's Note:**

> Got a few ideas for this - I'll try and update semi-regularly! Feel free to correct me on any continuity issues/mistakes etc. Hope you enjoy!


End file.
